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Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Women in the Age of Trump: “MACTRUMP” Playlet Spoof For The Trumpettes By Griselda Steiner

MACTRUMP by Griselda Steiner is a semi-finalist for NYCPlaywrights project "Women in the Age of Trump."

GRISELDA STEINER is a playwright, poet, freelance and screenplay writer. Her plays have been read at the Actors Studio, the Page Torn Salon, the Episcopal Actors Guild and the Woodstock Fringe. 

Thanks to Griselda Steiner for allowing NYCPlaywrights to publish this excerpt from her play MACTRUMP.
Three WITCHES, IVANKA (Trump’s daughter with Ivana), TIFFANY (Trump’s daughter with Marla Maples) and Melania (Trump’s current wife) are dressed as glamorous witches in black gowns and witch hats. They are making a witches brew in a large cauldron over a fire in a dark wood.

   WITCHES
 
   (together)

Fair is foul and foul is fair

We hover through the filthy air

Double, Double toil and trouble

Fire burn and cauldron bubble.
 
   WITCH IVANKA

Tiffany, your mother Marla took my father from my mother, Ivana.
 
   WITCH TIFFANY

Ivanka, your father said it was OK to call you a piece of ass.
 
   WITCH MELANIA

And I Melania, MacTrump was groping pussy while I was pregnant.
 
   WITCHES 
   (together)

PussyGate!

Round about the cauldron go

In the poisoned entrails throw in

MacTrump’s insulted women.

Like a hell broth bubble and toil

Let MacTrump's sins boil.

Cool it with some menstrual blood

Then the charm is firm and good.
 
   (They throw small dolls into the cauldron.)  
   WITCHES 
   (together)

Pigs, slobs, disgusting animals, Michelle the Baby - Nasty Chelsea - Rude Crude Rosie - Ginsburg the Faker - Bimbo Megan - Ugly Midler – Cher the Loser - Piggy Machado.

   WITCH TIFFANY

Pity no macho men came out to defend them.

   WITCHES 
   (together)

Wiccans now we curse MacTrump who treated us as broads he’d dump,

Hark I hear the Thane’s approaching speedy steed! 
   WITCH MELANIA

He wants to know our predictions after the election.

   WITCH IVANKA

Hark, now returns the Thane from his campaign.

   WITCH TIFFANY

Although he didn’t lose, his future fate is ours to choose.  
(CLAP of THUNDER. Orange smoke rises from the cauldron. MAC TRUMP enters.) 
   MACTRUMP 
   (to himself)

Let darkness hide my wicked ambitions

The work the hand must do for the eye to see - is the Tweet.

I said I’d make America great again

A promise I made so I could win.

   (to the WTICHES)

How now you secret midnight hags – what are you up to now?

   WITCHES  
   (together)

Oh noble MacTrump – come warm by the fire.

Let us know your desire.

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